|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 18, 2019 16:51:24 GMT
There’s nothing better than coming home from a long day at work Crash in the sofa Put one leg up and one on the other side And unbutton the tight ass jeans and just swell it all out I could get stuck here for an hour for sure  ![]()  Hahahahahahah ❤️ |
|
|
|
Post by heehawes on Nov 20, 2019 4:31:52 GMT
Fun is always fun, but it’s more fun with you.
|
|
|
|
Post by blackrosefore on Nov 21, 2019 17:15:01 GMT
So...I haven't been on in a while.
First some good news. I finished my first year as a registered nurse, working as a registered nurse. My boss gave me a decent score on my end of year review. Hooray!!
Now the Bad news.
I broke-up with my boyfriend last month. It happened during a phone call about meeting up that never went anywhere. I tried to contact him thereafter, and he went radio silent for three or four weeks. I called him and left voicemails. I texted. I sent one lonely email. He IGNORED EVERYTHING on purpose. Oh, it was deliberate. I had gotten enough of getting to know him for the almost seven months I spent in contact with him. If he had had any good news to share, you bet he would have found me and blurted it all out.
Which makes me think that he didn't get the match success in the field of urology, which was the medical residency that he wanted. And because he wasn't selected, he chose to punish the only part of his life that he could control--- he chose to punish me--- because I was part of his life-ish. It's easier to punish someone else when you aren't getting what you want. I was an easy target, I admit, because he had asked--- no, he had outright begged me for a second chance back in June--- and I had reservedly agreed to try with him once more.
He blew it. Punishing me by deliberately ghosting, and deliberately IGNORING me, does not make me desire him. It makes me feel angry and shit upon. I was supportive. I gave him my love, my patience, and a listening ear. I rooted for his success and prayed for his board exam. I made suggestions and fawned over him when he was sick. What he gave me in return was sexting;he gave me some responses ( only if he felt like it), and he gave me some lies about what happened to his phone... and one time, he gave me a outright statement of "you need to drop this"--- after I had asked him, point blank, to be more responsive towards me. I.e., respond to me when I send you a text message, or call you. He told me some lame excuses, and he told me to drop it.
Well, I broke up with him, back in October via text. And early this morning, I just confirmed it. I sent him a last text message, a month later, that said: Have a good life. Bye!
I don't deserve to be ignored. I also don't deserve to be denied the manner in which I consider myself to be loved. That manner is--- don't ignore me. RESPOND. It's quite simple. Then you will have and hold my affection.
I'm going through other changes as well. I'm leaving my apartment, soon. I'm going to have to move to a different place. Life goes on.
Next time, I might try eHarmony. I am done with most dating sites, since, well heck. This is my second go round with online dating sites--- and most of them that exist are just full of ghosters.
|
|
|
|
Post by Kimpie on Nov 21, 2019 17:41:52 GMT
So...I haven't been on in a while. First some good news. I finished my first year as a registered nurse, working as a registered nurse. My boss gave me a decent score on my end of year review. Hooray!! Now the Bad news. I broke-up with my boyfriend last month. It happened during a phone call about meeting up that never went anywhere. I tried to contact him thereafter, and he went radio silent for three or four weeks. I called him and left voicemails. I texted. I sent one lonely email. He IGNORED EVERYTHING on purpose. Oh, it was deliberate. I had gotten enough of getting to know him for the almost seven months I spent in contact with him. If he had had any good news to share, you bet he would have found me and blurted it all out. Which makes me think that he didn't get the match success in the field of urology, which was the medical residency that he wanted. And because he wasn't selected, he chose to punish the only part of his life that he could control--- he chose to punish me--- because I was part of his life-ish. It's easier to punish someone else when you aren't getting what you want. I was an easy target, I admit, because he had asked--- no, he had outright begged me for a second chance back in June--- and I had reservedly agreed to try with him once more. He blew it. Punishing me by deliberately ghosting, and deliberately IGNORING me, does not make me desire him. It makes me feel angry and shit upon. I was supportive. I gave him my love, my patience, and a listening ear. I rooted for his success and prayed for his board exam. I made suggestions and fawned over him when he was sick. What he gave me in return was sexting;he gave me some responses ( only if he felt like it), and he gave me some lies about what happened to his phone... and one time, he gave me a outright statement of "you need to drop this"--- after I had asked him, point blank, to be more responsive towards me. I.e., respond to me when I send you a text message, or call you. He told me some lame excuses, and he told me to drop it. Well, I broke up with him, back in October via text. And early this morning, I just confirmed it. I sent him a last text message, a month later, that said: Have a good life. Bye! I don't deserve to be ignored. I also don't deserve to be denied the manner in which I consider myself to be loved. That manner is--- don't ignore me. RESPOND. It's quite simple. Then you will have and hold my affection. I'm going through other changes as well. I'm leaving my apartment, soon. I'm going to have to move to a different place. Life goes on. Next time, I might try eHarmony. I am done with most dating sites, since, well heck. This is my second go round with online dating sites--- and most of them that exist are just full of ghosters. How hard it may sound, he didn't deserve you. You'll see you will find one day the love of your life! |
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 21, 2019 19:39:51 GMT
Fun is always fun, but it’s more fun with you. I just saw I got your postcard ❤️🙏 |
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 21, 2019 19:48:34 GMT
So...I haven't been on in a while. First some good news. I finished my first year as a registered nurse, working as a registered nurse. My boss gave me a decent score on my end of year review. Hooray!! Now the Bad news. I broke-up with my boyfriend last month. It happened during a phone call about meeting up that never went anywhere. I tried to contact him thereafter, and he went radio silent for three or four weeks. I called him and left voicemails. I texted. I sent one lonely email. He IGNORED EVERYTHING on purpose. Oh, it was deliberate. I had gotten enough of getting to know him for the almost seven months I spent in contact with him. If he had had any good news to share, you bet he would have found me and blurted it all out. Which makes me think that he didn't get the match success in the field of urology, which was the medical residency that he wanted. And because he wasn't selected, he chose to punish the only part of his life that he could control--- he chose to punish me--- because I was part of his life-ish. It's easier to punish someone else when you aren't getting what you want. I was an easy target, I admit, because he had asked--- no, he had outright begged me for a second chance back in June--- and I had reservedly agreed to try with him once more. He blew it. Punishing me by deliberately ghosting, and deliberately IGNORING me, does not make me desire him. It makes me feel angry and shit upon. I was supportive. I gave him my love, my patience, and a listening ear. I rooted for his success and prayed for his board exam. I made suggestions and fawned over him when he was sick. What he gave me in return was sexting;he gave me some responses ( only if he felt like it), and he gave me some lies about what happened to his phone... and one time, he gave me a outright statement of "you need to drop this"--- after I had asked him, point blank, to be more responsive towards me. I.e., respond to me when I send you a text message, or call you. He told me some lame excuses, and he told me to drop it. Well, I broke up with him, back in October via text. And early this morning, I just confirmed it. I sent him a last text message, a month later, that said: Have a good life. Bye! I don't deserve to be ignored. I also don't deserve to be denied the manner in which I consider myself to be loved. That manner is--- don't ignore me. RESPOND. It's quite simple. Then you will have and hold my affection. I'm going through other changes as well. I'm leaving my apartment, soon. I'm going to have to move to a different place. Life goes on. Next time, I might try eHarmony. I am done with most dating sites, since, well heck. This is my second go round with online dating sites--- and most of them that exist are just full of ghosters. Reading this raised my pulse cause I’ve been there myself. Being the best version of me that I could and more, but still none of that was ever enough. While he was the worst person you could imagine but at the same time the best person you could imagine too. Like mentioned already, he deserves garbage like himself and you deserve someone that has a heart, just like you. I want to give you three advices; One, you need to go FULL OUT NO CONTACT. Not even in your bad days. Not even if you forgot something at his place or vice versa. NO CONTACT. Two, give yourself time after a relationship like this. You will need it with yourself to understand what you been through. Three, do not blame yourself for anything of this, ever. Take it as a lesson learnt for realizing what you need and deserve. HUGS ❤️ |
|
|
|
Post by blackrosefore on Nov 22, 2019 5:18:26 GMT
So...I haven't been on in a while. First some good news. I finished my first year as a registered nurse, working as a registered nurse. My boss gave me a decent score on my end of year review. Hooray!! Now the Bad news. I broke-up with my boyfriend last month. It happened during a phone call about meeting up that never went anywhere. I tried to contact him thereafter, and he went radio silent for three or four weeks. I called him and left voicemails. I texted. I sent one lonely email. He IGNORED EVERYTHING on purpose. Oh, it was deliberate. I had gotten enough of getting to know him for the almost seven months I spent in contact with him. If he had had any good news to share, you bet he would have found me and blurted it all out. Which makes me think that he didn't get the match success in the field of urology, which was the medical residency that he wanted. And because he wasn't selected, he chose to punish the only part of his life that he could control--- he chose to punish me--- because I was part of his life-ish. It's easier to punish someone else when you aren't getting what you want. I was an easy target, I admit, because he had asked--- no, he had outright begged me for a second chance back in June--- and I had reservedly agreed to try with him once more. He blew it. Punishing me by deliberately ghosting, and deliberately IGNORING me, does not make me desire him. It makes me feel angry and shit upon. I was supportive. I gave him my love, my patience, and a listening ear. I rooted for his success and prayed for his board exam. I made suggestions and fawned over him when he was sick. What he gave me in return was sexting;he gave me some responses ( only if he felt like it), and he gave me some lies about what happened to his phone... and one time, he gave me a outright statement of "you need to drop this"--- after I had asked him, point blank, to be more responsive towards me. I.e., respond to me when I send you a text message, or call you. He told me some lame excuses, and he told me to drop it. Well, I broke up with him, back in October via text. And early this morning, I just confirmed it. I sent him a last text message, a month later, that said: Have a good life. Bye! I don't deserve to be ignored. I also don't deserve to be denied the manner in which I consider myself to be loved. That manner is--- don't ignore me. RESPOND. It's quite simple. Then you will have and hold my affection. I'm going through other changes as well. I'm leaving my apartment, soon. I'm going to have to move to a different place. Life goes on. Next time, I might try eHarmony. I am done with most dating sites, since, well heck. This is my second go round with online dating sites--- and most of them that exist are just full of ghosters. How hard it may sound, he didn't deserve you. You'll see you will find one day the love of your life! Thanks...right now, I guess there was a part of my heart that knew, before I gave him the second chance, that he'd blow it. I just knew. But I'm a kind person, and I don't usually want to judge others. That's why i gave him the extra chance, anyway. |
|
|
|
Post by blackrosefore on Nov 22, 2019 5:43:35 GMT
So...I haven't been on in a while. First some good news. I finished my first year as a registered nurse, working as a registered nurse. My boss gave me a decent score on my end of year review. Hooray!! Now the Bad news. I broke-up with my boyfriend last month. It happened during a phone call about meeting up that never went anywhere. I tried to contact him thereafter, and he went radio silent for three or four weeks. I called him and left voicemails. I texted. I sent one lonely email. He IGNORED EVERYTHING on purpose. Oh, it was deliberate. I had gotten enough of getting to know him for the almost seven months I spent in contact with him. If he had had any good news to share, you bet he would have found me and blurted it all out. Which makes me think that he didn't get the match success in the field of urology, which was the medical residency that he wanted. And because he wasn't selected, he chose to punish the only part of his life that he could control--- he chose to punish me--- because I was part of his life-ish. It's easier to punish someone else when you aren't getting what you want. I was an easy target, I admit, because he had asked--- no, he had outright begged me for a second chance back in June--- and I had reservedly agreed to try with him once more. He blew it. Punishing me by deliberately ghosting, and deliberately IGNORING me, does not make me desire him. It makes me feel angry and shit upon. I was supportive. I gave him my love, my patience, and a listening ear. I rooted for his success and prayed for his board exam. I made suggestions and fawned over him when he was sick. What he gave me in return was sexting;he gave me some responses ( only if he felt like it), and he gave me some lies about what happened to his phone... and one time, he gave me a outright statement of "you need to drop this"--- after I had asked him, point blank, to be more responsive towards me. I.e., respond to me when I send you a text message, or call you. He told me some lame excuses, and he told me to drop it. Well, I broke up with him, back in October via text. And early this morning, I just confirmed it. I sent him a last text message, a month later, that said: Have a good life. Bye! I don't deserve to be ignored. I also don't deserve to be denied the manner in which I consider myself to be loved. That manner is--- don't ignore me. RESPOND. It's quite simple. Then you will have and hold my affection. I'm going through other changes as well. I'm leaving my apartment, soon. I'm going to have to move to a different place. Life goes on. Next time, I might try eHarmony. I am done with most dating sites, since, well heck. This is my second go round with online dating sites--- and most of them that exist are just full of ghosters. Reading this raised my pulse cause I’ve been there myself. Being the best version of me that I could and more, but still none of that was ever enough. While he was the worst person you could imagine but at the same time the best person you could imagine too. Like mentioned already, he deserves garbage like himself and you deserve someone that has a heart, just like you. I want to give you three advices; One, you need to go FULL OUT NO CONTACT. Not even in your bad days. Not even if you forgot something at his place or vice versa. NO CONTACT. Two, give yourself time after a relationship like this. You will need it with yourself to understand what you been through. Three, do not blame yourself for anything of this, ever. Take it as a lesson learnt for realizing what you need and deserve. HUGS ❤️ Thanks, Dani! It will be easy for me not to contact him. A total freeze out is just that. Except for last morning, I easily managed three weeks of ZERO CONTACT. He never moved in, and I never left anything with him. We lived separate lives that never came together, you could say.
Oh, my eagerness to start anything right now is lost. After figuring out that I can make a man really so comfortable and happy, that he suddenly feels free to "list all of my bad habits and everything about me that annoys him"--- is not something I want to feel proud of. Well, I guess I am proud of myself that he got to be so comfortable with me, that he did open up...and I saw his true self. But no. I really thought my guy would build me up, too, just as I was building up and supporting him. I thought that love was about giving--- not listing every single trait about me that he considered "a bad habit" and that I "needed to break." His last girlfriend left him. He told me that much. Now, I see why. If you get too close, he criticizes the heck out of you.
I tried. But making a guy comfortable is just the same for me as making my patients comfortable. I try to listen to other people's sphere of existence. I don't judge them immediately for who they are. But it's not love for me when you ghost ( male or female, and I've had females ghost me just as often as males have). And it's not love for me, when you view all communication with me as a chore.
Why should communication be a chore? I have no idea. Well, I flatly refuse to be ignored. If you don't respond to what I say for days on end? I'm going to assume it's good-bye.
Well, I'm back to serious self-care mode. I do feel such saddness though--- and it's because all the love and support and parts of myself that I showed for seven months was wasted on a man who didn't deserve my energy. That part is disconcerting to my brain. At least my tool to get people to open up is good. I'm probably a good communicator, and he wasn't one.
|
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 25, 2019 19:51:55 GMT
There's something about long thick cardigans that go with just hot pants and a tee I am dead how comfy this is! |
|
|
|
Post by heehawes on Nov 26, 2019 16:33:04 GMT
CONFESSION: It annoys me when people refer to THANKSGIVING as "TURKEY DAY".
|
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 26, 2019 17:23:49 GMT
Mom just called me and got the results from her doctor. She has an infection and she has a change on her liver  (her mom died from cancer on the liver), her blood tests are good so I tried to cheer her up and tried to tell her to think healthy thoughts but as soon as we hung up I started to cry |
|
|
|
Post by heehawes on Nov 26, 2019 17:26:16 GMT
Mom just called me and got the results from her doctor. She has an infection and she has a change on her liver (her mom died from cancer on the liver), her blood tests are good so I tried to cheer her up and tried to tell her to think healthy thoughts but as soon as we hung up I started to cry awwww man.... you try and think healthy thoughts as well ❤️ I'll be doing the same for your Mama. And thinking of you as well..... sometimes crying helps.... give you a chance to let some of everything out, and process it all. 🙏🏻 Love you lots. |
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 26, 2019 17:30:14 GMT
Mom just called me and got the results from her doctor. She has an infection and she has a change on her liver (her mom died from cancer on the liver), her blood tests are good so I tried to cheer her up and tried to tell her to think healthy thoughts but as soon as we hung up I started to cry awwww man.... you try and think healthy thoughts as well ❤️ I'll be doing the same for your Mama. And thinking of you as well..... sometimes crying helps.... give you a chance to let some of everything out, and process it all. 🙏🏻 Love you lots. I can't believe the words I'm saying don't match what I'm feeling, and I tried so hard. But oh damn. Like give it to me I drink wine I deserve it more than her that doesn't even fucking drink stupid genetics  Anyway. I'm thinking the blood test hopefully mean that whatever they found it's hopefully at a good time. I love you too  |
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 26, 2019 18:12:24 GMT
Uhh she sent me the journals (WHY would you send that to someone like me with this OCD) and I could read that there's a 1/2 cm thing on her liver and the doc pretty much excluded the "common cysts" and after googling I found that they usually are 5-10 cm. Uh why'd she send me this for Jesus. Anyway I found someone having the same and it was a "birth mark" on the liver 1 cm big.
Anyway. I need to go down to dinner with everyone now and put on a happy face. Wohooo! I'll probably get in the bath after and come on here and cry some more.
|
|
|
|
Post by Dani on Nov 26, 2019 18:14:22 GMT
Maybe it's not OCD but what I mean is that I need to take control over the unfamiliar situation before I can live with it  |
|
(her mom died from cancer on the liver), her blood tests are good so I tried to cheer her up and tried to tell her to think healthy thoughts but as soon as we hung up I started to cry 
Anyway. I'm thinking the blood test hopefully mean that whatever they found it's hopefully at a good time. 
